P!$t off

I'm torturing myself~

Yes, you didn't see it wrongly, and I didn't wrote it wrongly neither. I felt that I'm asking for trouble. For now, I felt very left behind, unsecured and sad. It wasn't because of anyone, but indirectly things just didn't go on well for me.

Friends, I wonder how many actually reads this? Since my purpose of writing wasn't to impress anyone, instead voice out what's disturbing me, or thoughts that aren't meant to be spoken. I felt this blog is one of my "victim". Tragedy to my anger, companion to my sadness, and my very own secretary.

Everything started from Fri itself, then Sat, Sun and then, today... For what happen would remain unknown, for which I think it would be better to be so. Sometimes I just felt "used", cheated, or just simple as left out. I do wonder how valuable friendship is. Somehow, priority wasn't on me, somehow, I wasn't called. In the end, I kept telling myself that I wouldn't go anyway, that I'm tired, or even it's boring. Lies~

I'm not in a good mood today, mainly because of a misunderstanding happened. Maybe things gone worse after keeping everything to myself, compressing problems and try to forget after the day. Maybe it's just life. Who knows...

Somehow, after bath, I decided to put a stop in futsal & Dota. Weird? Not all all, since I'm not really into soccer ( I can't even dribble well~), I need a get myself back on track. No more sleeping late, waking up EVEN later.

I'm hurt, but not expecting someone to be there, for even I myself can't promise I'll be there for the other half. What a failure~ haha Maybe just life~

Good night TJ, you've been sleeping hardly 5 hours since yest, juz b'coz of promise sum1, and ended up getting things half done, while helping others instead. And I'm expecting you to sleep another 5 hours later after the midnight futsal. You're gonna die early, and I wish that could happen soon.

**I'm not expecting things to get better, nor expecting actions. What has done is done, move forward, and take a bigger step. P/s: not referring to what above<><><><>